Chez Soi

Adventures of a Year Abroad


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Strasbourg Day 1

Hey! We went to Strasbourg!

When we first got off of the train, there was like two minutes before we entered the taxi. In those two minutes, we learned one big thing about Strasbourg during the winter; It. Is. Cold.

After the taxi drive (in which the driver changed the taxi rate to the highest possible [I guess he thought we couldn’t read that sticker that says “Tarif D: tarif de la nuit, quand pas à coté de la gare.”]) we stepped out on the street of our hotel! Or so we thought… we learned later that Dad had accidentally booked an apartment. Unfortunately for mom, the fashion shop was closed. But anyways, standing outside the gate, we waited until someone came up and let us in. After slipping through the gate, we saw three doors. All of us hauled our bags to our door, 24b, and stayed in front of it for a while after realizing that there was no lobby, resulting in a longer wait for one of the owners to get the door open.

About an hour later, we went on a boat ride, which was pretty cool. You could listen to the tour guide with provided headphones too! They had ten languages, and six children counterparts. I listened to the normal English one for about twenty seconds but it was really boring, so I switched to the child’s version.  It was meant for little kids though, so it was a little weird to listen to a pirate for an hour.

Then we went to dinner with some friends. Strangely, we got there one hour early. Oops. When they came we gave some presents and ate too much. Yep. And I accidentally got paté instead of pâtes. So, I made some little mistakes. Not bad though. I’ve done worse in linguistics.

Me and my sister, Sara, both shared one apartment floor, while my parents shared another. Me and Sara found a game-show on TF2, called “Que le meilleur gagne” (That the best wins) and used it to “study French”. Well, we did learn that “zlataner” means to dominate. So, not at all time wasted.

 

That’s all for Day 1. Join me later when I recount the rest!


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2 Months In

If I knew then what I know now, maybe the last few months would have been easier…here’s the note I would have written.

Dear Paris Newbie Self:

You are about to go and move countries to have an adventure. And, by definition, adventures have highs and lows, twists and turns. So, you sometimes (mosttimes?) don’t know how it’s going to turn out. That is both good and bad. But you wanted an adventure. Remember that in the times ahead.

New cities (even ones as notable as Paris) are both wonderful and perplexing at the same time. You will go to the movies and that theater will be closed because of some unknown reason. You will go to an open market and it will turn out that summer construction is in full force for a metro line and the market you were hoping to enjoy is now gone for the summer. The city you have moved to goes into massive construction mode in August as they expect all citizens / residents to be gone. No one will tell you that. There will only be the noise to keep you company. Remember that being a new resident is different than being a tourist in any city.

You won’t believe it, but you will spend most of first few months here just trying to figure out basics like where to find nails to hang a picture, or batteries since they aren’t at the local grocer. You’ll be amazed at how hard it is to get dry cleaning done, how to get places efficiently, how to get groceries home with out a car, etc. You wonder why it feels like you are slogging through molasses with little to show for it. Let me tell you why. When you are here for vacation none of this matters. And when you are home, you know everything already. It never occurs to you how much ambient information you have in your native place to do the simple things. Until you don’t have it. Suddenly simple things aren’t simple. And all your mental and emotional energy is tapped by doing something as simple getting something mailed. What was once a 10-minute chore in your native land will exhaust you for the whole day. And you wonder why. But this is just an overhead tax for setting up a residence in a new spot. Add the new language is surely a part of this. But the totality of exhaustion is because all your brain power is being used up to do things you once could do with your eyes closed and brain synapses otherwise unused.

And the money worries that keep you up at night are a red herring. Yes, it’s true that things cost a lot in Paris. In Europe in general, about twice as much as US prices. Even basic underwear. And, socks. And… well, everything. Accept it. Just accept it. Stop looking at the prices on Amazon US and then Amazon France. It will only upset you. You are lucky enough to have enough money even as you dip into savings. It’s only a moment in your life. Remember the reason you wanted a year abroad to be with your family and to experience the broader world to become more global. Well, the extravagant prices is just a piece of that “broader world”.

And you must decide your attitude for this. On September 1 (what is called rentrėe) the whole city is shining and cleaning and (mostly) open for business. Shops that were barricaded during July and August will suddenly pop to life and you will think they are new, but really they are renewed. The fact that you don’t know anything makes you feel stupid, but really you ought to view it as a big game. Act like Gomer Pyle would have acted on the Andy Griffith show. Be surprised. Be astonished. Say to yourself, Golly Gee. Try to find some joy in it.

Along this way, you will think you’ll have lost your mind for wanting to go on this adventure. You will be tired of finding everything exhausting. You will be sickly tired of fighting with your family because all of you are collectively exhausted.

But please, don’t blame each other, blame the situation. And, remember this is NORMAL. (Things will inevitably settle down.) You came to this because you wanted to learn together, to be together, and to be closer. You are asking a lot of yourselves to learn a new language and keep both careers going WHILE doing this other thing. So keep the main thing that drove you here in mind. And that main thing is Love. Keep your love central. Keep your heart open. Forgive each other for the stress behaviors that keep showing up. Love is what got you to make this big leap, and it is love that will help you through it.

And all this will seem funny one day. I promise. Or I hope, anyways.

Signed,

Your paris rentrée self